Update: RIP Amy Winehouse

Amy Winehouse died today at the age of 27. Cause is of death is "unexplained".

Update: Kate Middleton, again

So yes, Kate Middleton. She got married recently. You might have heard.

So let the Jewish rumors re-commence! Since the Goldsmith line was not good enough, here's a new one: great-great-grandmother Elizabeth Myers. "Myers"! Well, that MUST be Jewish, right?

Wrong. Ok, we can't be sure, but it's unlikely. The name "Myers" itself is English/Irish. Yes, "Meyers" could be Jewish, but that's neither here nor there. What's more important is that Kate's family tree is researched at length, and the Myers were agricultural labourers in Yorkshire. Unlikely to be Jews.

Still not convinced? Here's the marriage certificate of Elizabeth's father Joseph Myers and Ann Swailes. Married in the Church of England. So... Not a Jew. Moving on? Please?

Update: RIP Macho Man

"Macho Man" Randy Savage, he of such surprising Jewish heritage, died today in a car accident. RIP.

Update: RIP Elizabeth Taylor

February 27, 1932 – March 23, 2011

So long, Cleopatra.

Update: Congrats John Baker!

John Baker, our elusive Jewish Eskimo, won the Iditarod!

He is the first Eskimo to win. We're willing to bet, the first Jew as well. (Okay, he's barely a Jew. Let us celebrate!)

Update: Rosenfels!

Oh how we cry for our once-patron-saint, Sage Rosenfels. A year ago, he was traded to the Vikings, and didn't take a snap behind Brett Favre.

And now, who comes to the rescue? Yakov's own New York Giants! Rosenfels has been traded to New York and will backup Eli Manning. Wait, we have also profiled Eli Manning? Wow, we get around.

Update: Oh yeah, about that Hitler guy...

So you might have heard this one in the news recently. Belgian grave robbers DNA researchers have studied the genealogy of Adolf Hitler's relatives and found that he might have been part Jewish (and part African). Not WAS part Jewish (and part African). Might have been. Yawn.

Actually, it's funny how the headlines distort the findings. That chromosome is not necessarily Jewish. It COULD BE possibly African. It COULD BE possibly Berber. It COULD BE possibly Spanish. It COULD BE possibly Jewish. Seriously... yawn.

Update: Philip Markoff is dead

Philip Markoff, the partially Jewish "Craigslist killer", killed himself in jail. "RIP" does not apply.

Update: So, is Amar'e Jewish?

An update from an article in the Wall Street Journal:

It appears that Mr. Stoudemire isn't Jewish under religious law. Mr. Stoudemire said his mother's links are solely from her study and appreciation of the Old Testament.

but, but, but...

While he doesn't consider himself religiously Jewish, he said he feels spiritually and culturally Jewish.

So yeah, Barely a Jew it is. Unless... well, there are plenty of mohels in Israel, right, Amar'e?

Update: Jew for Jesus is now with Jesus

Moishe Rosen, the founder of the oxymoronic Jews for Jesus, kicked the bucket earlier this week.

And... we're quoted in the NY Daily News!

The web site JewOrNotJew.com labeled Rosen "Barely a Jew" in 2008.

"Jews for Jesus? How does that fit?" the site wrote. "What's next, Atheists for God?"

Update: Sandra Bullock, a baby, and a mohel?

Ah, Sandra Bullock. No, not Jewish, but our most popular profile for six months running.

Today there comes news that Sandra adopted an African baby boy and will... wait for this... give him a bris. A Jewish bris, not your regular circumcision.

Could it be that we were wrong all along? That Sandra's Christmas-celebrating German family were actually hidden Jews? Nope. She probably just wanted to get back at her neo-Nazi soon-to-be-ex-husband. (Update: looks like they couldn't go to the hospital and this was the only option. Hooray for helpful Jews!)

But we're watching this situation very closely. Too closely for our tastes, actually.

Update: Taylor Mays gets drafted

Maybe Taylor Mays shouldn't have stayed at school. The JEWISH defensive back was projected to go in the first round if he came out as a junior. Instead, he stayed at USC for his senior year, and had to wait until the 17th pick of the second round to be taken, by the San Francisco 49ers.

And, well, Mays didn't handle it well. Apparently he was convinced to stay at USC by head coach Pete Carroll, now in charge of Mays' hometown Seattle Seahawks... and Mays let the words fly.

So much for be cool, stay in school...

Update: Oh, Larry!

What's wrong with this picture? Well, other than the obvious.

Larry King is divorcing his eighth(!) wife Shawn Southwick amid rumors that the CNN personality had an affair with Shannon Engemann, her own sister.^[1]

Oh, Larry!

Update: Scheyer leads Duke to title

Originally, when the Jon Scheyer profiled appeared on our site two weeks ago, it started with the words "Jon Scheyer might never lead Duke to the NCAA Championship". Well, that just changed. Scheyer scored 15 points, picked up 6 rebounds and dished out 5 assists in the title game.

Update: Mount Marxmore

Reader Greg from Virginia, who suggested the Gene Wilder profile, sent us the following email:

I read your write up on Henry Winkler and the lack of Jewish monuments. Well, I happen to be a stone sculptor, stone carver etc. My business can be seen at www.goldnerstoneworks.com. Attached is a photo of a Jewish sculpture I carved called "Mount Marxmore" it is carved in a 4800lb block of granite -- enjoy!

Update: Nothin' but a Jew Thing

We've complained in previous places about the whitebread world of the Justice League and even suggested they may have something in common with golf courses and men's clubs when it comes to bringing Jews into the fold.

But what about their Marvelous competitors, the Avengers? Well, Marvel comics announced today that the worlds's first Jewish rock (most Jews are sedentary, not sedimentary) would be joining the Avengers in a new series beginning in June.

Is The Thing the first ever Jew to join this elite establishment? Actually, no. Thing himself was once a member of the West Coast Avengers (kind of the superhero equivalent of the Canadian Football League, we grant you). But even not counting that (and really, who would), Thing is predated on the main Avengers squad by Vance Astrovik (aka Justice, aka Marvel Boy, aka Vance Astro, aka Major Victory, aka comics are really aggravating aren't they?). As Justice, Astrovik was a member of the Avengers along with his former girlfriend Firestar during the excellent Kurt Busiek run. AND Justice was revealed to be half Jewish (hopefully not on his abusive father's side) in the pages of New Warriors.

So The Thing is not the first Jewish member of the Avengers but he will be joining and that's a whole heck of a lot better than we can say for the No-Jewstice League of America. This concludes your nerd update for the day.

Thank you.

Update: Oscar the Canadian Folk Singer

So, I was watching Jeopardy last night (Alex Trebek, not a Jew) and the returning champion was a man by the name of Jordan Brand. They got to the point where they do the little interviews, aka, the point where I usually flip over to Attack of the Show for five minutes (Kevin Pereira and Olivia Munn, also not Jews), but somehow I flipped a little too fast and got Alex's interview with the champ.

It was a good thing, too, because Mr. Brand revealed that his father was a man by the name of Oscar Brand, a famous Canadian folk singer. Further, Oscar Brand had been one of the founders of the Children's Television Workshop, the inventors of Sesame Street. Jordan the Jeopardy champ then informed us that Oscar the Grouch, was, in fact, named for his father Oscar because of his curmudgeonly attitude during the planning phases of the show (all in good fun, we hope).

And, of course, Oscar Brand is Jewish.

So, more fuel to the "Oscar the Grouch is probably also Jewish" fire. Who knew I'd learn things watching Jeopardy (OK, everyone, but that isn't as much fun to say now is it)?